Meanwhile, in interesting loads for the Xtracycle, I biked a fully loaded crockpot to work for a potluck.

And on Friday I biked both of my younger girls to their school, where we had an early meeting with a teacher. I really wanted to get an action shot of our shadow, but I didn’t quite dare try.

Tomorrow, we’re going to give Sunday Parkways a whirl — this is an event in Portland where they close off a number of streets to auto traffic and let the rest of us play! That’s my Mother’s Day treat.

So OF COURSE it’s controversial. That’s why it’s on the cover.

I’m all for breastfeeding, even extended breastfeeding. But I still hate the cover.

First of all, the breastfeeding. That kid is three years old.I breastfed all three of my kids until they were over two years old. In much of the world outside of the United States, this is NORMAL. They probably just call it “feeding.” No extended business.

YOU have no business telling this woman (who is a real mother and not just a model) or anyone else that it is wrong to breastfeed her toddler. Or preschooler, or whatever. Yeah, I think it’s weird when I read about children who are 5-7 and still breastfeeding. But I’m not that mom. It’s not my place to tell her what to do.

I also don’t have a problem with breastfeeding in public. It’s a baby. Eating. It’s not about OMG, BOOBS! It’s nice to be as discreet as possible, but if you’ve ever tried breastfeeding, you probably know that babies are not always discreet. And they’re not good about waiting politely until you get home.

HOWEVER. This cover seems to be perpetuating the idea the breasts are only sexual objects. Even though she’s not a model, what we have here is a  skinny, blonde woman in a sexy pose. That is not helpful at all. I find it weird, actually. And not really representative of the attachment parenting movement.

I haven’t had a chance to read the article or articles on attachment parenting, because the articles are not available online unless you are a subscriber. Anyone want to chime in about those? I might pick up a copy if I get a chance.

That’s one of the reasons I continued gaining weight even though I was bike commuting every day.

I gave it up when I became determined to lose some weight. And then I joined Weight Watchers, and I really knew I couldn’t be doing that.

But recently, on a couple of occasions, I convinced myself again that I needed those burritos. And they were goooood. I know they’re junk. I know they’re nothing like a REAL burrito. But they’re SATISFYING junk.

Today they were calling to me again. I had a little trouble getting the kids up this morning, and didn’t have time to eat. And right up until that last corner where I’d have to turn to get to 7-11, I though I was probably going to go there.

Except, at the last minute, I didn’t. I said no. Because I haven’t been doing well with weight loss lately, and this wasn’t going to help me get back on track. I hated doing it, but I said NO to the breakfast burrito.

Instead, I ate the perfectly good food I had on hand at work: a fiber bar, an orange, and a cup of chai tea (I’d already grabbed a piece of string cheese at home to tide me over).

And yes, when I got to work and had to deal with…well, WORK stuff, I did feel resentful and deprived and wanted the comfort food. But I do know I made the right choice.

NOTE: This was yesterday. Today I was considerably more depressed and discouraged and I went and drank a couple of sodas. But I did still avoid the breakfast burritos.

Broccoli, cauliflower, green cabbage, Chinese cabbage, and
lettuce!

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So I make up for not being able to say that by reflecting that I am going to be so much better off than he is when gas hits $5.00 per gallon!

It’s a great place, with a terrific view, but I almost didn’t come. This is the annual staff retreat/reunion, and it’s VERY cheap because we all rent a big house together and share food. Really, it’s shockingly cheap.

But I still felt guilty and stressed about leaving for the weekend. Should I have even spent that little money? Don’t I have a hundred things to do at home? Doesn’t my family need me?

And I had a full schedule this week, with Girl Scouts and first aid training and a medical appointment as well as work, so I ended up feeling so stressed that I thought it might be less stressful to just stay home.

But, here I am. It’s beautiful, and the company is good, if a bit noisy (teachers gone wild!). I’m reminding myself to breathe. I haven’t entirely let go of the stress and guilt. I’m not sure I can. Sigh.

I pulled out my phone and checked the transit tracker to see when the next train was due. Nine minutes? That might or might not get me there in time, and the next train could very well be full, too.

I wasn’t certain I could do better by bike, but I decided to give it a try. I hopped back on the bike and swung into the bike lane.

26 blocks later, at the next station, I checked on the train again. It was still seven minutes behind me. I kept pedaling, and the street started sloping slightly downhill. I even passed a guy on a mountain bike, and I never pass anyone on the Xtracycle! The only problems I had were one four-block section (on E. Burnside from 181st to 185th) without a bike lane, and the left turn from Burnside onto Stark (which went fine once I got there; I was just nervous about it).

When I arrived at Kaiser Permanente Rockwood, which is right next to the Ruby Junction MAX station, I checked the expected arrival time of the MAX train. It was still five minutes behind me, and I still had a few minutes to check in for my appointment.

So yes, the train would have caught up with me eventually, but I did beat the wait time+travel time equation with my ride — about 3.7 miles in 20-ish minutes. And it was fun! I’d been tired and grumpy about having to go to this appointment (a freaking MAMMOGRAM; I’m not old enough for this!), but I definitely felt more energetic afterward.

I totally took the train back, though. I’m no saint. Plus my ticket was still good!

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However, this year the jam did not set! I don’t know why – perhaps I used the wrong pectin? Or the wrong variety of tomatoes? At any rate, I didn’t give the tomato syrup away (for the most part – I think I gave some to Melody anyway, because they are CRAZY for it). I gave away the strawberry jam, the raspberry jam, and the salsa, and left the tomato jam in the giant metal filing cabinet where we store the home-canned goods and empty jars.

So what to do with it? I used some on English muffins, like I did last year, but it really didn’t work well.

Then, one day, I decided to make baked beans. And I didn’t have enough ketchup for the recipe, so I used tomato jam instead. It was delicious! So I laid in a supply of canned navy beans, and we’ve had baked beans several times since. You could probably make a decent barbecue sauce out of it as well.

Tomatoey Baked Beans

• 3 15-ounce cans navy beans or other white beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 8-ounce jar of tomato jam
• Molasses
• Ketchup
• Yellow Mustard
• Chopped onion
• Bacon (cooked and crumbled/chopped) or hot dogs or other meat product if desired

Preheat oven to 425°F.

In the bottom of a baking dish (I use a round pyrex thingy), mix together the tomato jam, a drizzle of molasses, a drizzle of ketchup, and a smaller drizzle of yellow mustard. Yes, I said drizzle. I make a loose spiral around the dish, starting in the center. Adjust the amounts to your taste.

Add the chopped onions, beans, and meat if desired. Mix well. Place in oven and bake for 30 minutes (mixture should be bubbly and meat should be heated through).

You could also make this in a slow cooker, or turn the oven down and cook it longer. I haven’t tried this yet – I’m more the “it’s 5:30 and I have to make dinner, STAT!” type.